2010 in Books

Right, so -- I'm still in the throes of reviewing 2010. Like a tough cold, I cannot shake it. But, this list is of the fun and bookish variety. And, since I am still in the plotting stages for a new, book-oriented blog (wheeeeee!!), I will leave these meanderings to this space.

And heck, a recommendation for a new read is top notch in my books.

I snagged this one from The Cousin's blog -- she is one of the most voracious readers I know, so I knew this survey would be a solid one.

** Note: The survey is based on books I read in 2010, not necessarily books that were published in 2010.

Check it:

1. Best Book of 2010: I'll represent for the hard science fans out there and support The Stories of Ibis by Hiroshi Yamamoto. The novel deals with some weighted philosophical issues, and manages to maintain a pro-AI stance throughout it. Impressive, and go read it now.

2. Worst Book of 2010: I will opt for Michael Winter's The Death of Donna Whalen for this honour. I question whether I can even call this fiction, even after its nomination for the Rogers' Writer's Trust Award. Winter took real court testimonies and witness accounts from a murder trial in Newfoundland.... and all he did was shift the writing perspective from first-person to third-person. How can he put his name on that and claim it as his work? Lame to the power of infinity.

3. Most Disappointing Book of 2010: I was disappointed with The Children of Men by P.D. James. I made the mistake of seeing the film first, so I thought, "YEAH -- dystopian thriller where the end of humanity comes at a crawl due to (in)fertility issues? Whoa, HIGH ACTION, WHOA!!" Nope. Not in the novel. In fact, the only readers who might like this book have been to Oxford/live in Oxford/are obsessed with Oxford.

4. Most Surprising Book (in a good way!) in 2010: I was taken with Yoshihiro Tatsumi's manga-autobiographical work, A Drifting Life. I read a number of online reviews levying horrid judgments on me for not having read this book, even though I claimed to be a manga lover. I cried and begged for forgiveness as I raided the library for their copy. And WOW -- tour-de-force. I now pass the shame to you for not reading it.

5. Book You Recommended to People Most in 2010: Remainder by Tom McCarthy. Go read it, or I'm not your friend anymore. Ha, in all seriousness, I recommended this book to anyone who talked literature with me since September 2010.

6. Best Series Discovered in 2010: Hmm, I stumbled across a number of series in 2010. Most are shoujo manga titles, and I will spare you the details. I read The Walking Dead series by Robert Kirkman (up to Book 10), and quite enjoyed it. I also found out there are a series of books based on Torchwood, and, umm.... ItotallyboughtthreecopiesandIplantobuymore.....

7. Favorite New Authors of 2010: I have a few new favourites who launched their careers in the 2009/2010 split, and I am excited to see how their work develops in the future. Mad props for Lauren Kirshner (Where We Have To Go), Sarah Selecky (This Cake is For The Party), and Dexter Palmer (The Dream of Perpetual Motion).

8. Most Hilarious Read of 2010: Ah, apologies -- I have no laugh-out-loud titles. I was reading Can Lit most of the time. We are a deeply troubled people in our literature.

9. Most Thrilling Unputdownable Book of 2010: House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski, no doubt. This book thrilled (read: terrified) the brass out of me for a solid week after I read it -- as in, I slept with the lights on for two nights, I was that scared of this novel. Despite that, I recommend folks check it out. This title was a recommendation from Ship Sharp, and DAMN -- brilliant.

10. Book You Anticipated the Most for 2010: Ha, I am still anticipating it, actually. I put a hold on Emma Donoghue's latest book, Room, back in... September? October? 20-some-odd people have dibs on it before I do, still. Paf.

11. Favorite Cover of a Book You read in 2010: I have four that jumped out at me:

Hmm, so, I like covers that are:

A) Mostly white or mostly black.

B) Blurry.

C) Spacey.

12. Most Memorable Character in 2010: I'll have to opt for the unnamed Narrator of McCarthy's Remainder. His voice is captivating, and he is entirely unreliable as a narrator (just how I like 'em).

13. Most Beautifully Written Book in 2010: I found myself drooling over most of Dexter Palmer's prose in The Dream of Perpetual Motion. I have the urge to re-read it at a slower pace so I can absorb his linguistic charm for my own work.

14. Book that had the Greatest Impact on You in 2010: Well, physically, Danielewski's House of Leaves had the most noticeable impact as it prevented me from sleeping like a normal person. Umm.... I don't know that I was moved on an intangible level, though. I mean, moved long enough to select a specific novel for this category.

15. Book You Can't Believe You Waited Until 2010 to Finally Read: Ray Bradbury's From the Dust Returned. I've had it on my shelf since the book was published in 2001. I am a fool, and Ray Bradbury should kick my ass for it.

... And, since this is a queer blog, I vote Malinda Lo's Ash as the Best Queer Read of 2010. Oh-so-sweet re-telling of Cinderella, except our lead finds herself attracted to the King's Huntress instead of the Prince. Ah, the thirteen-year-old version of me would have been all up on's.

So, please do feel free to give this survey a whirl. I love discovering what others have read, and I wouldn't mind a recommendation or two.

The Sunday Survey: Part Three

Another Sunday evening, and another addition to the sprawling Sunday Survey here at Cute, Queer, Canadian. I worked a 7.5 hour shift chez Chapters, and I have finished the first leg of Christmas shopping for the season as well. Ohh, sweet discount on books..... what have I done all my life without you?

So, all part-time praise aside, here is the third installment of the epic survey in question. Find Parts One and Two ----> here, and ----> here.

Voilà:

The Sunday Survey: Part Three

20. Do I care too much about what others think of me?: I do tend to fret over other people's thoughts. I know it's futile considering I haven't mastered mind control yet (muahaha). Or, I should be more specific -- I have certain aspects or traits I am more sensitive about. I stress over whether people see me as successful or not, and I take great efforts to give off an air of intelligence. But then, I don't care what people think about me being queer, and I don't mind if people misread my shyness as attitude. Oh, and I tend to be sensitive about people stating, "You can live vicariously through me as I _______" -- I've had BIG issues over that one in the past.

21. Do I take offense too easily?: Oh, heck yes. I am a Sensitive Sally when it comes to glibness. I put a great deal of stress on myself, and I judge myself more harshly than I judge others. As a result, outside comments tend to hurt more because I use it to confirm some failing I perceive in myself. I know, vicious, eh?

22. What makes me happy?: A hot mug of green tea, a rich piece of chocolate, and a ridiculous episode of whatever anime I am hooked on at the moment. I also love cold, crisp winter mornings, and I love hiking in the fall. Music tends to augment my mood, so I construct soundtracks accordingly. Happiness comes from "earned stillness," for me.

23. Do I procrastinate?: YES. ONEMILLIONTIMESYES. Procrastination is an affliction at this point. I cultivated the practice in school, and it has worsened since I first left it. I even procrastinate on self-defined deadlines.

24. Do I stand up for myself?: I've gotten better at it since I entered my 20s, but I know I could develop the skill further. Consciousness about other people's thoughts tends to dampen my assertion abilities. I am making progress, though, so I need to celebrate my growth on that one.

25. Do I hold grudges?: No, not at all. Why spend energy on someone if you don't even like them in the first place? In all seriousness, a grudge drains a remarkable amount of attention and resources from your life, and I don't think I've been pissed off enough to warrant insulating my life with grudges.

26. Do I constantly dwell on the past?: I reflect a great deal on the past, and I find some aspects are hard to part with; however, I accept the actions I took or did not take, and I understand that I would act the same way even if I had the chance to re-live a moment or two. On a lighter note, I am a historian of sorts, so I do "dwell" on the past, a ha!

27. Do I let other people’s negativity affect me?: Oddly, no. I know I am a general pessimist, yet I am somehow resistant to other people's negativity....? Not sure how that one works. Perhaps two levels of negative thought cancel one another out....? If it's negativity about me, it will affect me. If the bad vibes are about other things, it tends to not take hold of me. Strange.

28. Do I forgive myself?: I find it difficult to forgive myself for certain choices or realities. I can accept them after time, but it's hard to forgive the mistakes or the inactions. I can forgive myself for petty things ("Ahh, I ate sugar when I said I wouldn't -- whatev") -- but yeah, the bigger hardships are difficult ones to move past.

29. Do I smile often?: Now, despite how bleak this survey seems, I actually do smile a lot. Folks are often shocked when I class myself as a pessimist -- ha, I am of the grinning variety. I tend to make myself laugh a lot, too, which is hilarious and disconcerting all in one. I make jokes to myself, and sometimes it takes all my power to not laugh out loud. I value wit and sharp senses of humour, so I have to make sure I practice (even if it's for an audience of ME). I noticed I don't tend to smile when I commute into Toronto even though I love taking the GO Train. Haha, it must be the whole "city attitude" thing taking effect. Haha, who knows?

The Sunday Survey: Part Two

As promised, I am forging on with the Sunday Survey (even in the face of my NaBloPoMo space-out on Friday night.... agh, the agony of forgetfulness....)

To re-cap: Endless search for NaBloPoMo material --> Discovered an old, 99-question survey buried in the archives --> Goldmine for Sunday content.

Good? Great.

Part One of the Epic Survey is right --> here.

And now:

The Sunday Survey: Part Two

10. Am I on the look out for opportunities?: I am -- if you've got leads, send 'em on over. (Ah, the passive approach to opportunism). I admit, I tend to have trouble spotting good opportunities -- or, perhaps I tend to misread situations, and I end up finding bad opportunities instead...? But yes, I like to cultivate experiences, and I like to observe the world around me, so new opportunities tend to foster those discoveries for me.

11. Do I seize opportunities?: Hmm, I think I need to work on this. I tend to balk at positive opportunities. Is it a fear of failure? Is it a fear of success, maybe? I know hesitation is a default position in me, or I tend to label it as "caution" -- I like to have ample information on me before I make a decision. Spur of the moment? What is that poppycock? I need to work on spontaneity. Or, I just need to relax and accept the fact that I just move slower than others and there ain't nothing wrong with it.

12. Am I open-minded? Am I flexible?: I tend to approach people with an open mind. New situations make me a touch nervous, especially when I'm not sure what's expected of me. Though, I tend to be a hilarious sight when it comes to culture shock which makes me a treat to travel with (I am bashful by nature, but it tends to amplify itself when I am in a social setting where I don't know the rules of proper etiquette). I also tend to roll with life, too -- I might not be one to make a group decision, but I'm willing to explore new scenes (even with a perma-blush on my shy self).

13. Am I quick to judge others?: Again, I tend to fall in favour of most people when I meet them. A person would need to treat me in a horrible manner to incur my wrath (and even then, there's not a great deal of wrath in me to dole out). I look for the best in people, and I tend to find it.

14. Do I take calculated risks?: I take calculation, without the risk. *Grin* I think I do need time to sit and mull over decisions before I would risk pursuing them. I still make bad choices at times, not gonna lie. But, when I find out it was a lame decision, I can at least articulate to myself that I made the best effort I could at the time. I get that when I think about my undergrad days -- even while I lament how I sacrificed to get excellent grades, I understand the choice, and I know I would do again even if I could go back. Ha, even though that's not a real risk, it explains my approach to the past and assessing my choices.

15. Do I give others sincere compliments?: I do -- it took me some time to build up the nerve to tell others how I felt (even close friends!), but I'm glad I was able to press past that internal censor. I find it amusing now -- when I give people compliments, I tend to state them in a matter-of-fact tone (since, you know, it's truth as far as I am concerned), and I think it throws people off....? Haha, I just don't want to mess about when someone is being awesome. All business, here.

16. Do I appreciate what others do for me?: I do, but I think I need to work on stating that appreciation more clearly. I make a pointed effort to thank people, and I make sure to look them in the eye when I say it. I think it stems from my own need to be acknowledged, so I try to make sure others feel noticed and appreciated.

17. Where do I want to go?: THE UNITED KINGDOM! I have been desperate to go since I was fourteen (though, I guess I must not be so desperate since it's ten years later, and I have yet to step down on British soil...) I realized a few months ago how most of the places I want to visit are all cold climate locales. Check it: Northern Canada, the U.K., Sweden, Norway, Russia, Northern Europe. Odd. I suppose I am a cold weather gal after all. I also want to go back to Japan. OH! And I want to go to Australia and New Zealand, too.

18. Who do I want to meet?: I want to keep meeting sweet, artistic, nerdy types who encourage me to develop myself, and who pull me out of my personal bubble to experience the world.

19. What adventures do I want to go on?: Oh, I could spend the night listing adventures. Travel adventures consist of the locations listed under Question 17. I have other journeys in mind, but those are all the cerebral, written word kind. If I can't travel to those places, then I'll invent 'em.

The Sunday Survey: Part One

While brainstorming ideas for another NaBloPoMo post, I stumbled across a rather in-depth survey squirreled away in a folder on my laptop. I had the intention to address it a number of months ago.... and then I promptly forgot about it.

Ah, but NaBloPoMo possesses the strength to dredge up all those hidden topics for the sake of daily posting quotas. What better form of filler is there than the illustrious Online Survey?

How about one drawn out for ELEVEN WEEKS OF CONTENT, WOOOOOOT?!

And these aren't run-of-the-mill questions either. No, no. We are intense here at Cute, Queer, Canadian, and we like to wax existential. I knew all those years of schooling would prove its mettle one day.

So, without further ado, I give you:

The Sunday Survey: Part One

1. What do I want?: Ooh, a question with heft to start us off. I suppose what I want most is acknowledgment. It's a recurring theme in my life -- I know we all struggle through loneliness, futility, and other stresses at times, but my quest for acknowledgment knows no limits. I tend to coast under the radar of others, and my shy tendencies keep me closed off even when I wish someone would just tell me I'm on the right track. Since 2008, I get the impression I've made mistake after mistake with almost every facet of my life -- sometimes, I wish there were someone there to tell me I've done a lot of good, too, even if I never noticed it at the time. I guess I just want to know I am doing right by myself and by the people around me.

2. What am I grateful for?: Well, from a queer perspective, I am effin' grateful for the role models I had as a young'un. From older kids at our high school to the folks I worked with at my first real job, I was surrounded by an amazing group of gay men and women who taught me that life out of the closet was possible, all when I was at the critical age of sixteen. I am also grateful for the friends I have, and for the family who accepted me without hesitation. It's a gay gal's dream, let me tell you.

3. What’s missing in my life?: I am missing self-confidence for one. I can fake it, but I wouldn't mind believing it, too. I am also lacking adventure in general. I've aged earlier than expected it seems. I need to get out and mingle more, but that whole lack of confidence thing tends to counteract my efforts. Heh, yeah, the social life is missing for the most part, but I do this to myself.

4. Do I see the whole world anew each day?: Not as often as I ought to. It's so simple to become complacent with the world, and to ignore those little moments of amazement. I need to master the whole Dead Poets' Society vibe of seizing the eff' out of the day.

5. Do I take the time to really listen to what others say?: I do -- I am an observer/thinker by nature, and I like to hear stories and launch into discussion of all sorts. I hear lesbians are pros at processing information, and I believe I live up to that hype. The best memories I have with others often involve hours worth of conversation held over mugs of tea. I imagine this will be the case well into the future.

6. Do I have fun?: Again, not as often as I should be. Bah, youth is wasted on me. Most of the time, I either drift through an unaffected fog, or I lose track of the present moment and float on waves of random thought. Fun tends to play off of a heightened awareness of one's environment and a disassociation from the passage of time itself. I tend to invert those two points, which is most likely why I am lacking fun most of the time.

7. How can I bring more joy into my life?: Ah, if I knew that, then I would have nothing to complain about, would I? I think the key to this would be greater involvement with family affairs, with friends, with community events -- the works. Keeping occupied tends to increase joy for the sheer fact it leads you to greater opportunities and distracts you from the darkness.

8. What do I want more of in my life?: I want to spend more time surrounded by other artists/writers/thinkers. I want more exploration of the local world and the world abroad. I want to collect more stories, and I want to share some of my own, too.

9. What do I want less of in my life?: Indecision. Oh, indecision is a curse -- it takes all those dreams and files down their brilliance. I've been fretful with it in the last, oh, three years, and I'd like to move on from the drama, thank you.

... Because It Isn't NaBloPoMo Without A Filler Survey

So there -- I made it through thirteen posts for NaBloPoMo before I fell back against the warm comfort of a filler survey. We are nearing the halfway point for this blogging month, and I imagine there might be another one of these gems on the horizon.

For other interested bloggers, here's the gist:

• Open iTunes, set 'er to "Shuffle"
• Write down the first lyric of each song as the answer to the following questions.

Got it? Golden. Here is what iTunes bestowed upon yours truly:

1. Your first words were?: "Twenty-nine pearls in your kiss, a singing smile."

("Everybody Here Wants You," Jeff Buckley)

Miz Moffatt: I was a randy child, it appears.

2. When you fell down from your bike, what did you say?: "Justice comes into your life and then you'll know."

("Camouflage," Third Eye Blind)

Miz Moffatt: Mmm, profound when injured.

3. What do your friends think of you?: "Help! I need somebody!"

("Help!," The Beatles)

Miz Moffatt: I am rather helpful when processing is involved.

4. What do you think about your friends?: "A warning sign -- I missed the good part, then I realised I started looking and the bubble burst."

("A Warning Sign," Coldplay)

Miz Moffatt: Sounds ominous. Apologies, dearies!

5. What was the first thing you said to your crush?: "I know you've got to go and I wanted to be afraid to say, but I'm not; I'm scared to death of what you've become."

("You Cheated Me," Martha Wainwright)

Miz Moffatt: I sound a touch afraid for someone who has a crush...

6. What was the first thing your crush said to you?: "One, two, three o'clock, four o'clock, rock!"

("(We're Gonna) Rock Around the Clock," Bill Haley & The Comets)

Miz Moffatt: ... and this response would explain the hesitation.

7. How did you respond?: "I wake up exhausted."

("Wake Up Exhausted," Tegan and Sara)

Miz Moffatt: Most likely from the rockin' around the clock... or from the fear...

8. What did you say when your best friend and you were having a fight?: "Oh, you crawled out of the sea straight into my arms."

("Crawled Out of the Sea (Interlude)," Laura Marling)

Miz Moffatt: Ooooh, evolutionary insults. SNAP.

9. What is the line that describes what you're feeling?: "Close your eyes, and I'll kiss you."

("All My Loving," The Beatles)

Miz Moffatt: No need for words -- let me show you.

10. What is your message to the world?: "Oh, I am growing tired."

("Hate This And I'll Love You," Muse)

Miz Moffatt: In general.

11. What was the first thing you said in your wedding vows?: "You ask me how I've become mad, now."

("Madman Running Through the Fields," Dantalian's Chariot)

Miz Moffatt: Nothing says "I love you" like psychadelic rock.

12. What did your husband/wife say on their wedding vows?: "So long ago, I don't remember when, that's when they say I lost my only friend."

("One Headlight," The Wallflowers)

Miz Moffatt: .... Where are you going with this, wifey?

13. What are the first lyrics you will dance to on your wedding?: "I've waited for so long, put up with your shenanigans."

("Saturday Night," Noisettes)

Miz Moffatt: An awesome song from a wicked band -- I would be down with this choice.

14. When you're scared, what do you usually say?: "Nicotine, Valium, Vicodin, marijuana, ecstasy, and alcohol!"

("Feel Good Hit of the Summer (Reprise)," Queens of the Stone Age)

Miz Moffatt: I scream addictive substances. It calms me more than the substances themselves.

15. When you cry, what do you usually say?: "Jo-Jo was a man who thought he was a loner, but he knew couldn't last."

("Get Back," The Beatles)

Miz Moffatt: Aww, consoling myself with another's sorrow.

16. When you're angry, what do you usually say?: "Waiting line till your time, ticking clock --everyone stop."

("In the Waiting Line," Zero 7)

Miz Moffatt: Calming music meets raging anger...?

17. You cry over what words?: "Beware the bottled thoughts of angry young men."

("Nightmares by the Sea," Jeff Buckley)

Miz Moffatt: Hmm, ominous.

18. What did you say when you told your/or your partner's friends that you were pregnant: "She's an ugly girl, does it make you want to kill her?"

("Pieces of You," Jewel)

Miz Moffatt: HAHAHAHA -- I will be an unfit parent.

19. What did they say?: "No one can blame you for walking away."

("Underground," David Bowie)

Miz Moffatt: Bowie, FTW!

20. What's your biggest secret?: "Eighty years, an old lady now sitting on the front porch."

("Painters," Jewel)

Miz Moffatt: My biggest secret: I will age.

21. When you breakup with someone what do you say?: "Will you take me as your mistress?"

("Mistress," Inara George)

Miz Moffatt: I like to leave doors open.

22. Your first thought when you wake up?: "I try to remember your room."

("Your Room," Mia Doi Todd)

Miz Moffatt: Sure.

23. What are the last words you will say?: "Just one look and I felt so -- I'm in love with you."

("Just One Look," Ted Hawkins)

Miz Moffatt: Aww, a deathbed confession of love. I do like grand exits.